Final feast – final chinwag. tell us who you’ve got on the guest list
Definitely my mum and all my family, plus all my ex-girlfriends. That should be a giggle.

More than a giggle. would that make it a small, select gathering or a coach party, we wonder? tell us where the rave is
In an old, large country house in the middle of the Scottish Highlands.

You won’t need a visa, then. By the way, how are you making your entrance?
In a luxury yacht with a jucuzzi full of Champagne.

Which you’ll be reclining in. Are you drinking any of the golden fizz?
Sort of. I’ll have a glass or two of French 75 (Champagne, gin and lime), thanks.

Different. And the grub?
Black cod fish fingers, lobster and truffle mash and a big tub of lemongrass ice-cream.

Millionaire’s comfort food. Who’s doing the cooking?
Jason Atherton – a talented chef whose food I’ve never eaten – and Pete and Tracy, my flatmates (I eat like a king when I’m at home).

drinks, bread, cheese?
Grüner Veltliner. Onion focaccia – yummy! Cheese – yuck!

Steady. How about coffee?
Kopi Luwak coffee from South Africa with home-made fortune cookies dipped in white chocolate.

But you know what’s about to happen! sounds?
Gipsy Kings, The Closest Thing to Crazy by Katie Melua, and Elvis.

uh-huh-huh. any flowers on the table?
Anything orange and yellow – my favourite colours.

What about threads?
White shirt, jeans and flip-flops – nothing flash.

any After-dinner speakers?
Michael Caine and Sean Connery.

Any other entertainment?
A game of Twister.

Are there any critics you’d like to turn away at the door?
None – they’re all welcome.

And something foodie which we could remember you by?
Chilli-salt squid, duck and watermelon salad, Chilean sea bass, Shaoxing wine.

Ian Pengelley is head chef at Pengelley San, London Carlton Tower hotel (opening January 2005)

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