A new way to succeed - close down!
Struggling west London seafood restaurant Deep may have found the perfect way to pick up its sluggish trade - it has closed for three months. Never fear, though, the Chelsea harbour outlet has a cunning plan to boost business - in the shape of three-Michelin-starred curser Gordon Ramsay.
The out-of-the-way site hopes the antics of the former Oxford United playmaker and his celeb chums will put it firmly on the map as the location for the second series of TV show The F Word. We presume the F-words that owners Christian and Kerstin Sandefeldt have in mind are "finances" and "fortunes".
Canaries ready to crow While England football fans are unconvinced of their team's likely success at this summer's World Cup, Delia Smith is clearly in no doubt.
Her Norwich City corporate hospitality machine has swung bullishly into action, with a programme of footballing fun that includes events all the way up to the final on 9 July.
Just go steady on the vino if they win, Delia. We don't want booze-fuelled cries of: "Let's be ‘aving you, Sven!" to ruin the party.
All choc and no fattening It seems porn fans find it difficult to have a night off. So say the Dutch funsters behind Full X TV, anyway.
Launching its Full X TV hotel licence ("because viewers demand to be able to view our channels when they travel"), the Amsterdam-based "pioneer in the adult leisure world" was keen to stress the full extent of its package. Channels include Full X Choc, Full X Chic, Full X Choc+3 and Full X4 Free.
Bewildering stuff, but Full X Choc+3 sounds the most fun.
Missing the points With so much talk of sneaky practices in the world of contract catering, last week's Association of Catering Excellence quiz night was a chance for some good, clean healthy fun. Or so guests thought.
Round one asked teams to name six London Tube stations with two words in the title that began with the same letter.
While most of the 31 teams racked their brains for answers, the Missing Ingredients table decided it would be easier with a Tube map in front of them. Alas, they didn't count on some eagle-eyed judging and, despite the clamorous protests of managing director Sean Valentine, the team was docked 10 points for their troubles.