Get a licence for the kiddies, not the pubs

Licensed trade observers cannot have failed to notice that demographics is the latest buzz word on the lips of trade trendies.

One article recently used demographics as a vehicle to suggest that changing social patterns, coupled with more relaxed licensing laws, have meant that customers are now "demanding" pubs where families with young children are positively welcome to visit and eat.

Under the provisions of the Deregulation & Contracting Out Bill, which came into force four years ago, all licensees have had the option to apply for Children's Certificates. If the certificates are granted, licensees are able to welcome families, including accompanied children younger than 14, into bars where food and soft drinks are served.

If licensees were to believe these demographic projections, they may well be considering applying for a certificate, but it would be prudent for them to stop and think, not least because public opinion on the whole issue of children in pubs is polarised.

Those who think it is a good idea are mainly people with children under the age of 14. But those who think the opposite are far from the minority, and cover all sorts of people, including those who have children at home and who go to the pub for a break.

One of the arguments most frequently put forward by those who would like to see children allowed into all pubs is that there are no such restrictions in mainland Europe.

This may well be so, but children brought up in mainland Europe are not as badly behaved.

In the surreal, brewery-funded world of Wacky Warehouses, Charlie Chalk's Fun Farms and the like, where "Yabba-Dabba-Doo fun" is a key element of attracting young customers, excessive or hyperactive behaviour may well be considered normal and almost certainly goes unnoticed within the confines of the soundproofed "play-barn".

Badly behaved children

The vast majority of pubs do not have these facilities, however. In the fullness of time, when licensing laws relating to children have been brought in line with those on mainland Europe, we could see a situation where badly behaved children in pubs is the norm rather than the exception.

While I welcome the more liberal, Continental approach, I am also aware of the fact that the average British adult has a completely different concept of parenthood, food and drink from that of their Continental counterpart.

Mealtimes here in the UK are seen by the majority of people as no more than a necessity.

In the home they are little more than an interruption, and in restaurants they are seen as a challenge where size of portion and speed of service are the main criteria.

Children, or "kiddies" as they are corporately referred to, are seen as a separate species who need to run around all the time, or to be provided with separate entertainment facilities and who need to eat different food, preferably while still on the run.

This ghastly amalgam reinforces the Continental view that the British are a thoughtless, ill-mannered nation whose children are badly brought up.

By contrast, the Continental concept of mealtimes is that they are hugely enjoyable and are the focal point of the day.

Children learn from a very early age that it is a real pleasure to be allowed to take part in this daily ritual and, as a consequence, sit down with the adults, make their contribution to the conversation and learn to take their time over the pleasures of the table, whether at home or dining out.

The demographer's notion that pubs should offer the best of both worlds simply because 13% of the population is under the age of 10 years is an oversimplification to say the least.

Such a quantum leap does not take into consideration the wants and needs of the silent majority. Nor does it take into consideration the fact that most licensees cannot afford to provide breast-feeding rooms, nappy-changing and disposal facilities, separate entrances and exits and huge, indoor play-barns filled from floor to ceiling with bright, colourful toys, games and play apparatus.

Parental responsibility

I readily admit that a fundamental change of approach is needed. But whether parents in the UK would respond to the notion that there is more to parental responsibility than simply allowing their children to run riot is quite another matter.

Instead, perhaps it might be an idea to introduce legislation requiring them to apply for a licence to show that they are fit and proper people and that their children are well-behaved before they are allowed on licensed premises. n

David Best is publican of the Bushell's Arms at Preston in Lancashire