Table talk
Conference planners come by new ideas
It's always a bit of a chore for conference organisers to find ways to keep their delegates entertained at the end of the day - go-karting and clay-pigeon shooting are becoming a bit old-hat.
But the Hall Garth Hotel near Darlington could have the answer. The hotel, part of the Regal Hotel Group, is offering sessions with two working sheepdogs to learn the skills displayed in the top TV programme One Man and His Dog.
What will venues do next to help their business guests relax? Perhaps a spot of lion taming, or a wee bit of alligator wrestling before adjourning to the bar?
Superchef comes to the rescue
Table talk would like to pay tribute to Lagi Tsiopani, chef and superhero at the Cattleman Steak House in Bristol.
One evening last month a customer began choking on his food. When Mr Tsiopani heard the commotion, he rushed from the kitchen, threw his arms round the man's waist and squeezed him hard under the ribs a couple of times, dislodging the offending piece of food and saving his life.
When the man was feeling better he left the restaurant - just as his father began complaining of chest pains and collapsed unconscious on the pavement. Out came life-saver Mr Tsiopani who helped to resuscitate the man before the paramedics arrived.
Marco's better buttie challenge
All those who think they could teach Marco Pierre White a thing or two about food should take up the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity advertised on East Coast Intercity routes.
White is challenging travellers to create a great sandwich and win dinner for two at The Restaurant, in the Hyde Park Hotel. So if you want to impress the man looking to revolutionise on-board catering, get eating - each entry must be accompanied by an East Coast sandwich label.
Cooking up a grouse about poachers
John Webber, head chef at Kinnaird hotel in Dunkeld, Perth-shire, has cooked up a new recipe for chef recruiters south of the border.
He says he's sick and tired of seeing young, talented chefs being poached by London restaurants, so he plans to start sending his Poacher's Pie creation to them.
"The recipe consists of old haggis and grouse guts and I'll send it second class so it foments on the way," said Mr Webber. "They should get the message we don't want them poaching our young chefs."
A normal reaction to Murphy's law
I was shocked to hear about a well-known London restaurant that suffered a raid by 50 armed police. The restaurant's staff were arrested (temporarily) and the lunchtime service suspended.
According to my informant, who refused to disclose the location, neighbours became suspicious about late-night activity at the premises and told the police, who began monitoring mail.
The boys in blue apparently became convinced that something was afoot when they spotted letters addressed to a Mr Murphy.
Sounds like some top detective work to me - almost as convincing as the evidence against the Birmingham Six.
Bovine haven from death penalty?
I can't work out whether the following story, which I read in the Daily Telegraph last Monday, is an April Fool's joke or not. Can anyone enlighten me?
According to the newspaper, the World Council of Hindus in India is offering sanctuary to cows due to be executed in the UK following the scare over mad cow disease.
