Table talk

That's a crushing disappointment

Fatty Towers, the hotel in Margate, Kent, that specialises in holidays for extra-large guests, featured in the pages of the tabloids last week after two customers proved that even its specially designed beds have their limits.

A couple who booked in for a "romantic weekend" managed to leave two beds in a state of severe disrepair. Given that their combined weight was nearly 50 stone, maybe it shouldn't have come as too much of a surprise.

Poor little rich boys

Robert Peel, head of Thistle Hotels, has come into the media line of fire for his benefits package, in the light of the company's forthcoming flotation on the stock market.

But Mr Peel, who will pocket up to £1.5m as a result of the listing, can be forgiven for feeling a little victimised. After all, several other recent hotel company flotations have left directors with even fatter wallets.

Most notable was Macdonald Hotels, where chief executive Donald Macdonald and two other directors came away with more than £30m between them after investing a total of just £500,000 to set up the company in 1990.

Then you'd better serve us in seconds

I've heard of restaurants taking off, but Eco, a trendy pizzeria in Clapham, south London, really takes the biscuit. Since opening three years ago, the place has been buzzing, night and day, seven days a week - so much so that booking a table is now imperative.

I was amazed, and not a little insulted, to see on a recent visit that the management has now printed a curt little note to customers on the menus, asking that they be in and out within an hour-and-a-half.

It goes on: "If you wish to stay longer, please arrange it with the manager."

Eat, drink and be amnesiac

Reading through some interesting research from McDougalls on eating out at Christmas, I noticed that half the people interviewed said they ate out with family, while 45% said they ate out with work colleagues and 5% said they couldn't remember.

Asked what they ate, 50% said turkey, 45% said other items and the other 5% couldn't remember.

And where did they eat their celebratory meal? Half went to a restaurant, 45% ate in the work-place and the other 5% - you've guessed it - couldn't remember.

Well, after all, it was Christmas.

Now eating is bad for your lungs

Caterers in this country have suffered from all sorts of food scares over the past few years, but spare a thought for our colleagues in Hong Kong, where even the cooking methods are coming under fire.

Scientists examining air quality in the colony have found that a major cause of pollution is cooking oil.

The wok stir-frying, used by many of the restaurants packed into the teeming city, vaporises the oil, sending possibly carcinogenic particles into the air.

A tricky little souffle riddle

Change one letter in the word "shuffle" to give you something to eat. This puzzle was set by a BBC Radio 4 announcer, leading into an item about a forthcoming broadcast.

Most people solve the problem in 35 seconds, she added.

Struggling fruitlessly with the riddle, I didn't hear anything about the forthcoming programme.

Only when the solution was given did I realise I had misheard the question. I was trying to make something edible from the word "shovel".