Oil's well after a kitchen slip up

First week into my new job as chef de partie in a large conference and training centre, and I was still getting to know everyone and trying to make a good impression.

All was going well until the deep fat fryer broke down. We called the resident electrician in to take a look and when the fryer was emptied of oil, he began to replace one of the elements. Having completed the job he asked the nearest chef - me - if I could replace the oil so he could switch on and see if it was now working.

The oil had been drained into a five-gallon bucket. I picked up the bucket and was just about to pour the oil into the fryer when I suddenly wondered whether the drainage tap was switched off.

Asking the electrician to check this, I rested the oil on the edge of the fryer. Suddenly, the whole bucket of oil slipped off the edge and covered the man from head to toe in a thick gunge of dripping oil. His expletives are unprintable, and it was all I could do to keep a straight face and apologise. It was, after all, an accident. Honest!

The catering department duly got a bill for two bottles of shampoo, and I certainly made a lasting impression by inventing gungeing long before Noël Edmonds ever got the idea for it.