Table talk
Sadly, Egon doesn't give marks for good services
The likelihood of Egon Ronay producing a guide to hotels and restaurants in Afghanistan seems slim, but that won't stop you finding the Egon Ronay Guide to places to eat and stay in Afghanistan on the Internet. Ronay himself does not know what is going on and regards the country as "a place to be buried, not to go out for dinner", so the whole site may be an elaborate Afghani joke. Ronay said he was quite flattered that his name had been pinched, but he still plans to take legal action over the trademark infringement. Meanwhile, look at the site and marvel at the delights of the Hazarajat Technical Training Centre at Behsud, which can surprise visitors with the best plumbing within 100 kilometres, a flush toilet and plumbed mixer shower. "Even the electricity supply works."
Next week: Laurence Llewelyn-Bowen cures your cold
There are those who regard Feng Shui - the Chinese art of harnessing auspicious energy patterns for health and wealth - as little more than pigswill, but the owners of Knoll House hotel in Studland, Dorset, are not among them. Following its Feng Shui makeover from sober magnolia to a calm and cheering haven of greens, golds and reds (complete with cunningly sited mirrors, lights and silk flowers) it has, unlike its neighbours, failed to lose any bookings to the foot-and-mouth epidemic. As Chinese restaurants have been groundlessly blamed for bringing the disease to Britain, it seems only fair that an Oriental import has been credited with serving as a vaccine against its economic ravages.
Now you know why Irish eyes are smiling
The Internet and its search engines are wonderful ferrets at finding the information you want, but the Web is a crowded place and what you want is not always what you get. A search for information on the Irish pub chain Kitty O'Shea's using Yahoo and the obvious search phrase "Kitty O'Shea's Ireland" revealed a site showing pictures not of a bar, but a bra, or rather the absence of one on a range of silicone-enhanced ladies from around the world. Further down the Web site lists was the real Kitty O'Shea's Irish pubs Web site, but it's tempting to wonder which site gets the most visits. Upon being told of the crossed web-wire, a spokesman for Kitty O'Shea's was most grateful. "I'll take a look."
Green peas objector wrecks restaurant
A man in Australia was so outraged when he opened his take-away meal and found it contained peas that he went to the restaurant he had ordered it from and wrecked it, causing £2,500 of damage. Sam Lynch, 28, had asked staff at a Red Rooster in Brisbane to stop putting peas in his meals because his girlfriend was allergic to them. When they failed to do so, he went to the restaurant and ran riot. He smashed the tills and the fridges and then went outside and hurled loose paving stones through the window. He pleaded guilty to causing wilful damage and was given a three-month suspended sentence.
